The Real Fight Club of University: A Look at Conflict Through Culture

Let us be real — university isn’t just about cozy study sessions, all-nighters powered by energy drinks, or lively after-class hangouts. Behind the fun-loving exterior, there is a silent war going on. Welcome to the real fight club.

When students from different countries, cultures, and mindsets are thrown into the same space, misunderstandings are almost inevitable. What is considered “polite” in one country might seem passive-aggressive in another. One person’s “being honest” might feel like an attack to someone else.

The first rule of fight club? We do not talk about fight club.
But today, we are breaking that rule — and taking a closer look at how university students from three different countries handle the drama, disagreements, and day-to-day tensions that no one ever really talks about.

To understand these differences, we conducted a survey across Poland, Bulgaria, and Lithuania, asking students how they experience and deal with conflict on campus.

So why do conflicts arise?

Like I mentioned before, people have different mindsets and customs, so conflicts are often caused by miscommunication — or more often, the lack of communication. Sometimes, people expect to be understood without really explaining themselves. When there's no clear discussion, unmet expectations quickly turn into frustration.

More than that, how we communicate can also be part of the problem. Especially in university, where you're constantly meeting new people with all kinds of communication styles — some are blunt, others are shy, loud, or quiet — and not everyone is used to that mix. What one person sees as honest, another might perceive as rude or cold.

And let’s not forget stress. It plays a huge part in creating conflict. When we’re overwhelmed or caught up in our own problems, we don’t always pay attention to how we come across — and without meaning to, we can end up hurting someone.

These are just a few of the common reasons why conflicts happen — and why it’s so important to talk, listen, and try to understand each other.

How can we prevent conflicts?

According to the Lithuanian group, the most important thing is being open-minded and understanding. They emphasized the importance of trying not to judge others but instead trying to truly understand their perspective.

The Bulgarian group believed that communication is key. They stressed how essential it is to talk things through before getting upset, and to never leave things unsaid. They suggested that clear and honest communication can stop many conflicts before they even begin.

Similarly, the Polish group also highlighted that communication is the most important factor.

What surprised me, though, was that a few responses from different countries said that conflicts cannot be avoided at all. That really gave me something to think about. Can they be avoided, or can they not? After all, we are all adults capable of respect and communication, aren’t we?

How can we resolve conflicts?

Well, it would be amazing if we could avoid them altogether, but the truth is, we all need some tips and tricks to handle tough situations when they arise.

The most important step is to talk to the person involved. Everything else comes after that. Open, honest conversation is key. But talking isn’t enough on its own, you also need to listen. If you truly want to resolve something, you must try to understand where the other person is coming from and how they perceive the situation.

It's equally important to express how you feel. Let the other person know why you're upset or uncomfortable but avoid blaming or attacking them. Blame only makes it harder for the other person to really hear what you’re saying.

Also, try to plan. Set aside time to talk things through calmly, face-to-face if possible. Avoid handling serious issues over text, because miscommunication is much more likely that way.

In my opinion, one of the biggest things that helps prevent and resolve conflicts—and even build stronger relationships—is respect. Respect each other’s differences, value each other’s time and habits, and remember that at the end of the day, we're all just trying to be understood.

Conclusion

So, it seems like university life is our own version of Fight Club — but instead of fists, we throw words, silence, and the classic side-eye in the hallway. But here’s the thing: in this fight club, we should talk about it. We shouldn’t be afraid to speak up, to listen, and to try to understand each other.

After all, as Fight Club says, “You don’t truly know someone until you fight them.”
So maybe those misunderstandings, those small conflicts, aren’t the end of connection — maybe they’re the start of a real one.

-        - by Akvilė Zapolskytė